the romantics would call this a love story, the cynics a tragedy pt I
by ImOnlyYourWorstFuckinNightmare
Summary: "Every great love starts with a story".. Before he ever became Dean Ambrose, there was her.. This is how Dean realized that love was right under his nose and the ups and downs between himself and Audrina (ofc) before he ever becomes Dean Ambrose. full warnings and summary inside. Book I of II or III, reviews are loved, no flames, please?
1. disclaimer and intro

**& a quick note from the author**

I do not own the WWE Superstars, nor do I own the WWE brand. If I did? The divas title would NOT be tit pink. Just saying. Oh and we'd see a whole lot more singles matches with Ambrose and Reigns in them because personally, I think those two are the future of the business, as well as quite a few others. We'd also see a LOT more Justin Gabriel and Zack Ryder.

Anyway, yeah. I don't own anything except the original character (Audrina Camden) and the plot I am going with for this story.

Another note.. Since this starts BEFORE Dean Ambrose became Dean Ambrose, (it starts in the ofc and Dean's late teens,actually) no. I do not know the guy personally. I've just been a fan for a few years now and anything I use is fictional, and 90 percent of it can be found in various promos and interviews he's done. I've been wanting to write a love story for the guy, and I've never actually tried getting into the mindset of him, so, here goes nothing.

FYI: I'm probably going to use quotes from the movie that sort of inspired this story, The Notebook. Just a heads up, people. I apologize, but this shit happens when I subject myself to that movie at 1 am and my mind's wide awake.. Forgive me?

Being as I'm not profiting from this in any way, shape or form, reviews are loved and greatly appreciated. This is just my own personal spin on some stories I've seen similar with a whole different plot.

**& cautions, warnings, other information:**

There will be swearing, graphic violence and eventually, graphic sex. If any of this makes you uneasy, do not read this story.

There's a good chance that one or more characters might be a little OOC. I apologize for this, but I am really going to try and avoid it. Like I said in my authors notes above, I haven't ever tried to actually get into the mind of Dean Ambrose before, so yeah. I'm going to try this, maybe it won't be absolute shit. If it is, I'll take the damn thing down, if it seems like nobody likes it.

If the plot concept seems familiar, it's because it's based partially on stuff I've seen in The Notebook, Romeo + Juliet (with a little bit of Runaway Bride, you'll see why when the time comes) and it's meant to be a love story with some dark and odd twists, turns and complications along the way.

**About The Original Character, Audrina Camden:**

***First of all, just to be clear, she is ****NOT**** the girl who he talks about shooting their dog in high school. I repeat, she is ****not**** dog girl. ***

Full Name: Audrina Lynette Camden

Nicknames: Drina (only Dean will call her this, everyone else uses her given name)

DOB: December 6th 1987, making her at least 3 years younger than Dean Ambrose at the start of the story.

How she knows/met Dean (Jonathan)

Audrina was born in Cincinatti, like Dean was. Her parents are probably upper middle class, very stern and judgemental, very strict on her, or at least they were when she was growing up. She was essentially controlled by them to behave a certain way, interact with certain people, from the start. A lot of this has to do with the fact that her father was a detective at the local police department and her mother was on the school board, very active in the church they attended, things like that.

She met Dean (or Jon, rather) when she was probably in 2nd grade, when his mother came to the school they both attended, during a school board meeting, made a scene because she was completely drunk. The two of them became friends, but Audrina's parents never liked him all that much so she was limited in access to him.

Something you should know up front.. Audrina's father is a very, very tempermental man, very controlling also. He's also a heavy drinker himself, and though it's sporadic at best, he has been known to abuse Audrina and her mother if he thinks they're 'out of line', which 90 percent of the time, they're actually not, he's just that big of an asshole, really.

By the time they're in high school, after Audrina's moved back to Ohio, (because her family moved to New Jersey when they were in the last parts of elementary school ), Audrina's fallen for him, he's falling for her slowly, it takes him a lot longer to trust, (and given the fact that she's been gone for a while at the start of the story), I'd imagine, due to what he went through growing up..

And then, of course, the parentals find out.. But not only this, they have their own problems keeping them apart as well (friends and the like)..

**^^ This is where the story will pick up, when they're in their teens. That's why I wrote out the friendship part here, so nobody's confused.**

Personality:

quick tempered

protective of those she allows close to her

nurturing

jealous

creative

independent

competitive

she sort of goes along with what adults say because she's afraid to let loose and be herself, do what she wants. This mostly applies to her parents, not people her own age. She could honestly give a damn less what people her own age think of her.

Quiet, tends to keep to herself a lot

she's actually pretty shy at times, particularly in large crowds and around people she doesn't know well.

Looks:

see the cover image & my profile once I've posted this.

Fears:

loud and sudden noises.

Being around a lot of people drinking, because her father and his friends on the force drink and that's when some scary things have happened to her in the past.

Disappointing her parents.

(It should be noted, however, that this is the first part of a series and it's only meant to be a short story, really.. By the end of this part, she won't be afraid of disappointing them, when the events that are going to happen have taken place.)

Small spaces and total blackout darkness.

Dying young.

Losing the love of her life at a young age, or something equally bad happening to him.

Favorites:

Color is Red

Time of Day is sunset

loves sleeping late

prefers rain to sunshine

chocolate chip cookies

cheeseburger and french fries, root beer

prefers classic rock and hard rock to any other music

likes being outdoors

loves to paint

loves to dance

& that's basically it. The next chapter is the beginning of the story, picking up from the last thing I talked about above, in her history. This story will most likely be shorter than the sequel, because there's really only so much I can do with the two of them in high school without messing things up plot wise, royally.

I hope you guys read it and review, favorite and follow.

If this sucks ass, blame the fact that I was up at 1 am watching the Notebook and ugly sobbing, again. Sort of going through some shit right now, and yeah.. The Notebook is a movie that has this affect on me. -fingers crossed- here's hoping to hell this doesn't suck epically, though.


	2. the scariest thing about distance

"_**The scariest thing about distance is that you don't know whether they'll miss you or forget you." **_

The drive back to Ohio had been an exhausting but exciting one for Audrina. She'd been hoping that one day, maybe, she'd get a chance to come back and see him again.

She twisted a strand of blondish brown hair around her fingertips in the back seat of her parents car as she thought back to the last time she'd seen him, her childhood best friend, Jonathan Good.

_- flashback -_

_{ Jonathan Good, 14 / Audrina Camden 12}_

"_Hey Jon?"_

"_Yeah, Drina?"_

"_Promise me when we move you won't forget me.. Please? I won't forget ya."_

"_Don't make promises ya can't keep, Drina." Jon said quietly as the two teenagers swung on an old swingset down at the park. The sun was sinking lower and lower in the sky, and this was the last night he'd see his friend Audrina, most likely the last time he'd see her, ever._

_Her father's shouting angrily had her grimacing, gritting her teeth and Jon grabbed her hand. He could tell the man had been drinking and he said calmly, "Come with me. I.. I wanna show you something."_

_He took her to the spot he always went when his mom was at work, or she had one of her boyfriends over, this little hill beside the bridge across the road from the apartments._

"_Jon, I'm gonna get in trouble." Audrina muttered as they parted some bushes, walked up a steep trail. The bridge was right next to them and Jon stepped up, held out his hand. "Do ya trust me?" he asked, smirking, the beginnings of a cocky smile as he looked down at her, waiting._

_The yelling of her father, who didn't like Jon, not in the slightest, this being a huge reason she had to sneak out and hang out with him, or anything, was getting farther away now, maybe he'd go down to the bar at the end of the block and tie another one on._

_She hoped so because there was so much she wanted to tell her best friend before she had to leave him for good, so many things she wanted to make sure he knew before she was gone, before she couldn't run to him when her father hurt her or her mother and scared her._

"_I asked ya a question, Drina." Jon said calmly, as he held out his hand, still standing balanced on the edge of the bridge, waiting._

_Audrina smiled and grabbed hold of his hand, letting him pull her up onto the bridge's edging as she muttered quietly, "With my life, Jon." to answer him._

_He smirked and then sat down on the edge, patting the railing next to him. Audrina sat down carefully and then gasped as she looked out over the whole city, the sun dipping lower in the late afternoon sky, painting it pink and orange and a sort of dusky shade of purple._

_They were leaving when night came. Her father had gotten a job in New Jersey as a detective on their police force, and he had to be in New Jersey by the beginning of the next week. Since they were making the drive across country, he wanted to start early. _

_It wasn't a trip Audrina was particularly looking forward to, because she knew her father took this job, on purpose, to get herself and her mother away from her grandparents, their butting in and meddling, accusing her father of cheating on her mother and abusing both herself and her mother._

_This was his way of asserting his dominance, making sure his 'girls' stayed under his thumb. He was good at that kind of thing._

_She'd probably never see Jon Good again, and this thought had her a little more than sad and bitter. She didn't want to leave him behind, she knew that as bad as she had it, he had it ten times worse. She didn't want to leave behind her protector without his own protection._

"_I'm.. I'm gonna miss ya, Drina." Jon murmured as Audrina looked up and said quietly, "Not as much as I'm gonna miss ya, Jonathan." _

_His arm slid around her waist and he cautiously pulled her closer. He'd already lost his younger cousin, who was also Audrina's friend to CPS. His mom was constantly hurting him and letting men into the apartment, letting said men rip them off while she got high. To date, Audrina was probably the one good thing (other than his dream to become a wrestler ) he had left and now she was being taken from him too._

_And he'd probably never get to see her again, tell her how he felt about her in all honesty.. How he'd been feeling about her for the better part of the year almost that he'd known her._

_Biting her lower lip, she leaned up and pulled his head down to meet hers, then clumsily kissed him. She'd never actually kissed a guy before, but she'd wanted to kiss him for a while now. Since she was leaving and probably never going to see him again, now seemed like a good time to do it._

_Jon caught his breath a second, then pulled her from the railing beside him, sitting her in his lap, deepening the kisses as he stopped them and looked at her, trying to catch his breath._

"_Any reason ya did that?"_

"_Jon.. Remember how I read ya that book called the Notebook a while ago?"_

"_That chick book?"_

_Audrina laughed, nodding as she said "That one.. There's a quote in that book.. I want you to remember it, cause it's.. It's how I feel about you.."_

"_What is it?" Jon asked, as he looked at her in curiousity, actually sort of 'seeing' her in a different way. He swore under his breath. Naturally, he'd spend all this time as her best friend, never once realize how he really felt about her until she was about to be lost to him too. He waited, wondering what she was trying to tell him, what she was about to say._

" _You are, and always have been, my dream." she muttered quietly as she looked up at him, trailed her finger slowly along his lower lip._

"_And ya leavin. Story of my fuckin life." Jon muttered bitterly as Audrina sighed and hugged against him, scooting closer to his body where she sat in his lap, her head resting in his neck, taking one last deep breath in, his cologne filling her nose. "I don't want to go, Jon. I'm only 12, I got no choice." Audrina mumbled as she looked up at him, the tears stinging her eyes now. _

_She wanted to cry more than she had in a really, really long time, right looked at him and bit her lip as she sighed and said quietly, " I'm never gonna get over you. I'll write ya and.." as he held his finger to her lips and shook his head._

"_Don't make promises ya can't keep, Audrina. I'm not gonna promise anything either, okay? If we see one another again, it happens.. If not.. I'm gonna try like hell not to forget ya." Jon muttered as he gave her a gentle shove towards the apartment complex, towards her waiting parents and their moving van, towards a new life.._

_- end flashback -_

Her father's clearing his throat and giving her a stern look had her jolted out of her mind, looking back at him, as she asked quietly, "What do you want?"

"I mean it, Audrina. If I even think I see you with that damn Jonathan kid again while we're back here, you will not like what happens as a direct result. He's a bum and he's no good. He's gonna wind up in prison if he's not dead already."

"You'd love that, wouldn't you?" Audrina flared before she could stop herself.

She braced herself for the sting of his hand on her cheek as it came next and she dropped her eyes to her lap as she murmured, "Yes sir, I promise."

"Good girl. Now get out and get your ass in that school building. Remember our talk just now, Audrina.. I meant what I said.. If I see you two together, you will not like what I do."

Her father's car drove off, dropping her off at the high school. She'd hoped he'd bring her directly to school, she personally didn't want to spend another day trapped with her parents, their rules, the fighting, their expectations.

At least at school, she wouldn't have to worry about her father getting drunk, getting angry, 'disciplining her' for something he imagined she'd done, or just because he felt like doing so.

The moment she was in the hallway, her warm brown eyes scanned the people around her, trying to find Jonathan. She was more than a little disappointed when she didn't see him.

He'd be a senior this year..

She was actually ahead enough that she was eligible to graduate early, and she'd decided that she wanted to take all of the seniors courses this year too. So she held out hope that maybe they'd have a class together or something.

All she did know was that she had to see him again. She'd thought of this moment the entire trip back to Ohio, so much so that she'd been almost too excited to sleep.

The secretary handed her a schedule, pointed her in the general direction of her homeroom after pressing the call button, letting her homeroom teacher know she was on her way down to the classroom.

The teacher was really boring Jon. He'd been torn between nodding off and doing something, raising hell somehow just to get the hell out of here, so he could ditch and go to the gym when the intercom kicked in, rousing him out of his almost asleep state.

The teacher answered the secretary then turned off the intercom and turned to the class as she said "Apparently, we're getting a new student. Her name is Audrina and she's moving here from New Jersey.. Now she's younger than you all are, so for the love of God Almighty, be nice to the poor kid."

This last statement, when said, was uttered mostly for Jon's benefit, he suspected, as Jonathan Good had the reputation, and a well earned one at that, for school hellraiser.

As soon as he heard the name, though, he was tuning out anything else the teacher said in regards to her being in his class.

"Nah.. It's not the same Audrina." he mumbled.

And if it were, he figured that most likely, she'd completely forgotten about him by now.. There'd been at least 4 years to this point, and even if he hadn't forgotten her, he figured that he'd been forgotten.

Audrina turned the knob on the classroom door and stepped in, taking a seat near the middle of the classroom.

As soon as he saw her, he sucked his breath in a little. It was Audrina.

Feeling eyes on her, she looked up and around, and almost immediately, her eyes locked with his. She managed a smile, mouthed, "Hi." as she wrote something down on a slip of notebook paper, hurriedly then tapped the girl sitting between himself and her.

"Can you give this to him?" she asked, nodding her head to Jonathan.

The girl looked at her, brow raised and hissed "Are you crazy? If you're smart you will not talk to the guy."

"Give him the note."

"Fine. It's your funeral." the girl stated matter of factly as she turned and gave Jon a scowl, tossed the paper onto his desktop.

Jon rubbed his neck, looked up from carving his initials into the desk's wooden surface, gave the girl sitting next to him a deadly glare as she pointed to the slip of paper, nodded in Audrina's direction and mouthed, "Apparently, she's stupid."

He slid down lower in his desk, unfolded the slip of paper and read it.

_'I missed you, Jon!'_

For a few moments, his hands hesitated over the pen on his desk, and eventually he picked it up and wrote back, _'Sure ya did.' _as he tossed the paper onto the girl between them's desk and tapping her, leaned in and muttered, "If ya smart bitch, ya move.. Let her have ya seat. I mean unless ya just like havin to play messenger."

The girl gulped and hurriedly got up, changing seats with Audrina, who sat down next to him.

She bit her lower lip as she read his reply to her note, then looked at him. He shrugged and then raised his hand, asking the teacher, "We're a book short. Audrina can use mine."

Eyes turned on him and he smirked his usual arrogant smirk as the teacher looked at him for a moment almost as if he had three heads then sighing said "Alright Jon.. But no tricks. No disruptions."

"Not makin any promises." he muttered as he slid his book between their desks and nudged her with his elbow, moving a little closer, whispering, "I ain't the same guy anymore."

Audrina studied his eyes a moment, bit her lower lip as she shrugged and muttered back, "Yeah? Well, I'm not the same girl anymore, either." giving a slight wink as she did so.

Of course, she didn't realize just how much he'd changed, and how much he'd been through while she was gone.

She sat reading the History book, twisting a strand of her hair around her fingertip as she did so, fully aware of his staring a hole through her. She finally looked up, gave him a questioning look.

This was sort of awkward. All the 'dreams' she'd had time to formulate on the ride back to Ohio.. This was nothing like them. It was almost like the young man he'd grown into was trying to make as many people as he could, hate him.

This scared her slightly.. But not enough to stop the way she felt about him then from flooding back.

She'd fought her way into his life one time, she'd just have to do it again, apparently.

But how?

The second the bell rang, they gathered their books quietly, and she was walking out, down the hallway to her locker, when he caught up to her, tapping her shoulder roughly.

"Ouch, damn it, Jon." she said as she turned around, looked at him intently.

"Ya gonna hear a lot of shit about me. So I'm probably not gonna be 'that guy' ya pretended to give a damn about back then, Drina. Whether ya believe them or not is ya business, not mine." he muttered casually as he caught sight of his friend Sami, gave her one last look over slowly, with his eyes, and made his way into the thickening crowd, catching up to his friend.

They were going to blow off the rest of school that day, and go down to the gym, train with this guy they knew named Cody and his friend Les.

Just like every other day.

Audrina stood there, his 'warning' repeating over and over in her mind. She saw him about to slip out of a broken emergency exit, and before she realized what she was doing, she was following him, blending in carefully.

Jon was just about to open the door when he felt a hand on his arm.

"Where are you going?"

"Where I always go." Jon said stiffly as he looked at her, not quite sure how to proceed. Yeah, she was back, yeah he still wanted to be her friend, but the fact remained...

He wasn't that kid anymore.. Since she'd left, he'd lived through a lot and he'd learned a lot, been burnt a lot. And he was fast closing himself off from everyone.

If he didn't want to hurt her, which he feared he'd ultimately wind up doing, he'd discourage her from getting close to him again now.

Audrina watched him walking off, confused. Sure, she got why he was like this, she remembered how bad he had it back then, but..

He was different now, more closed off than he'd been back then.

It left her wondering just how hard this was going to be, getting back into his life, and if she'd ever be able to do it..

Because she knew that she was still in love with him. That she'd probably always be in love with him. If 4 years apart hadn't changed that, then this new attitude of his probably wouldn't either.

She turned and walked down the hallway, going to her next class, worried about her former best friend, the guy she loved more than anything.


	3. the first time you fall in love

_**"My daddy said, that the first time you fall in love, it changes you forever and no matter how hard you try, that feeling just never goes away." **_

"So.. you gonna nail that chick?" Sami asked as he toweled off his dark hair and tossed the towel to Jonathan who gave him a dirty look then muttered something Sami couldn't quite make out.

"What'd you say?"

"I said the next time you ask me somethin like that, Callahan, I'll fuckin kill ya." Jon said calmly as he gripped the collar of his friend and training partner's tanktop, sneering at him, adding, "She was a cute piece of ass though." instantly feeling like an asshole the second he said the words aloud. But he didn't want to look like some sentimental moron in front of his only actual friend, and one of the 'guys', so yeah.. He had to act like that.

What he felt for her went way beyond that, they went way too far back, they were too close as friends to even consider the possibility.. So they'd kissed before she moved a few years ago.. Didn't mean a damn thing, really. Of course, the 18 year old male could say this all day long, until his last breath, but even now, deep down, he just knew that it wasn't true. It hadn't just meant something, it'd meant everything.. To him, at least.

But he wasn't a good guy, he wasn't the same shy kid who got bullied a lot like he'd been back then. He was meaner now, he was angrier now, he actually hated everything and almost everyone, and right at the top of his list of hate? Himself.

"So do ya know her, or?" Sami asked, looking at his friend, a smirk on his face, his intentions clear. Jon growled and grabbed him again, putting him in a headlock. "Yeah, I know her. And no, ya not gonna, Callahan." he muttered as he dropped Sami onto the mats next to the makeshift ring in the middle of the gym. Sami might be older, he might have fancied himself tougher, but Jon was going to make this one thing crystal clear to the guy.

If anyone got Audrina? It'd be him.

The two males had just stepped out of the gym, just in time for Jon to step out into the night and smack straight into Audrina. He blinked a moment, then smirked at her, doing what he usually did when he was around Sami, saw a hot girl.

Audrina looked at him, confused as she raked her hand through her hair which was falling out of the half up and half down hairdo she'd worn it in at school earlier. "Jon, hi.. I was actually thinking we could walk back to the.." she started as Jon shook his head and then smirking leaned in and said quietly, "Decide to come across the tracks, have a little fun, Audrina the princess?"

She blinked as the words hit her like a slap in the face. What the hell was his problem? When she looked, she realized that he was standing with two other males, obviously he was doing this to keep up appearances, right?

She rolled her eyes, bit her tongue, the urge to say something right now overwhelming her. Instead, she muttered quietly, "Nevermind. It's obviously not worth my time." as she gave him a disappointed and hurt look, turned and walked away quickly.

She'd gotten about a good halfway down the sidewalk when the guy stepped out and grabbed her, smirking as he asked, "Now what's a pretty thing like yaself doin' all the way over here on the bad side of town?"

_'Shit. What the fuck have I gotten myself into now.. if someone from the force drives by, sees me here.. Dad's gonna kill me.. Or just make me wish I was dead.. And all Jon did was try and hurt me, make me look like an idiot because unlike he obviously has, I didn't forget him.' _the petite female thought to herself as she rubbed her arms, tried to think of something witty and brash to say back. When the guy grabbed her, though, she smirked and stomped his toe, punched him in the gut and took off running towards the park she'd spent so much time with Jon in as a kid.

Had she looked back, she'd have seen the Jon she remembered so well, as he jumped Lavon Turner for trying what he had just now.. But the petite teenage girl didn't look back, instead, she ran to the park, sat in the swingsets gasping for her breath as she put her head in her hands, swearing at herself for being stupid and naieve enough to think he'd even give a damn about her after all this time. Obviously she'd been the only one who felt anything that night she kissed him before moving.

Obviously she was pathetically hanging on to the past like the needy and clingy girl she felt like right now. She grimaced as she remembered the way his eyes slid slowly and dismissively over her body moments ago.

"What the hell happened to ya, Jon?" she wondered aloud as she finally let herself cry for a few minutes then stood on shaky legs.. The only way back out of this part of town, the part of town she used to call home when she lived here a few years ago, before her father got the big promotions on the force, and she knew this well, was through a maze of very scary and very mean people.

People who'd just as soon kill her as look at her, especially if they remembered her, remembered her father was a cop. In this neighborhood, they hated cops.

She sat back down, steeling her nerves as her mind went back a little, farther than the kiss that'd basically kept her going for the better part of 4 shitty years away from the guy she'd decided had to be the one at the stupid and childish age of 12.. It went back to the day it all started, when she'd been in second grade and Jon, who was older had been in about 4th if memory served.. The night they met, the night he probably saved her ass.

_- flashback -_

_It was getting darker out and Audrina knew that she'd get her ass beaten brutally if she was out after dark and her father came home, drunk and found out about it. But she'd already tried to get back to her apartment once and the scary guy kept staring at her, making obscene gestures at her, licking his lips.. "You sure are a pretty little girl.. You wanna come over here and sit down on my lap, talk to me, pretty girl? I got cookies and candies."_

_"Leave me alone." Audrina asserted as the man reached for her wrist, her snatching away, flinching back as far away from the smell of alcohol on his breath, the stench of neglect on his skin as he jeered up at her, his broken jack o lantern smile, yellowing teeth practically glowing in the darkness. "You stink." she said as he glared at her, went to stand, stumbling, pissed at her observation._

_The boy ran past her but doubled back when he saw the signs of a possible struggle. At first he just watched quietly, but when the old man grabbed for her again, he grabbed her quickly and tore off down the alley with her. "Ya live in apartment 4c, right?"_

_Audrina nodded, still in shock at what'd almost happened to her just now, her stomach churning in nervous energy. "I'm Jon. I live in 4b. Ya can't just screw around down here after dark, are ya stupid?" he asked as he looked at her, concern in his bright blue eyes as he studied her. She stammered and finally said "I.. I was late leavin the library.. Had to take the bus and missed the first one back here.. It was dark and all the buildings look the same.. My dad's gonna beat my ass.."_

_Jon shook his head and said "Ya dad's not home. Saw him go in the bar down the block. I'm gonna help ya this time, princess, but next time, ya on ya own." and looked at her, really looked at her a moment. He managed a smile then said quietly, "Okay, so ya might not be on ya own.. But ya better hope I'm around again. Need somebody with ya if ya gonna walk around down here after dark."_

_Audrina nodded quietly and he said calmly, "I'll see ya around, princess." as he looked at her one last time, retreated upwards to his own partially open window and then into his room. _

_She stood there with her hand in her hair, looking up for a few moments and a small smile formed on her face. The next morning, to her surprise, she felt a tap to her shoulder, turned to see him standing behind her, his hands jammed in his pockets, a Walkman sticking out of his thin and holey jacket pocket as he shrugged casually. _

_They didn't talk much, but when they were on the bus, he poked her and asked in curiousity, "Whatcha readin?"_

_"It's a babyish book, I.." she stammered as she tried to hide the fact that she was reading a big book of fairytales. But he'd seen the cover, he burst into laughter for a moment before going silent.. "So last night.. I was like ya knight in shining armor." he mused as Audrina smiled brightly, nodded and then said shyly, "Thank ya for that."_

_"Had to do something. That jerk messes with my little cousin like that too. Pisses me off." Jon said as he held her gaze a moment, fell silent. He smirked to himself when he felt her small hand close over his, felt her pressing a woven bracelet into his hand as she smiled and said "We can be friends.. I'm Audrina."_

_"I'm gonna call ya princess Drina." Jon stated casually as the bus stopped and they got off, each going to their own classroom. After that, the two were inseperable, even when her father told her they couldn't be together anymore, and she snuck out to play with him._

_- end flashback -_

"Knew I'd find ya here. Ya still have no damn sense, do ya?" Jon muttered as he looked down at her, his arms crossed, a mild smirk of amusement on his face as he kicked at rocks below his feet. "About just now."

"Don't bother apologizing. I was obviously stupid to think you'd just be the same sweet guy you were. People change, Jon, happens all the time.. I just wish.."

"What, Drina?"

"I wish it hadn't happened to ya, okay?" she said quietly as she saw the bus back to 'her side' of town and sighing said in defeat, "I'll.. I'll see ya around or something."

"Hey Drina?"

"What Jon?"

"Maybe ya wrong.. Maybe I didn't change." Jon called out casually as she waved him off, stepped onto the bus, flopped into a seat. So her first attempt at trying to get things back to the way they had been was a failure.

She was having thoughts about giving up. She leaned her head against the smudged windows of the bus and watched the buildings go by, watched ruin turn to the pristine small houses of the gated community she lived in now.

They really weren't that different.. But he seemed to believe otherwise.. How could she make him see that she still felt what she had then, now? She hadn't wanted to leave then, she'd had no choice, really.

Now it seemed like they were worlds apart.

And she hated it more than anything.

She snuck into her bedroom and fell back onto her bed, looking up at the ceiling, her hands on her ears trying to block out the sounds of a loud and violent fight between her mother and father in the floor below her room.

Everything was changing, getting worse and Audrina had nothing to hold on to, nothing to make her feel safe and secure. She didn't even have Jon's friendship now, apparently, because she lived here and he lived there, the two sides of town rarely mixed and when they did, the outcome never went well.

But she wasn't going to let that stop her. Somehow, she was getting things back the way she wanted them. She just had to regroup is all.. There had to be some way to make him see her, see how he made her feel... She had to do something to fix this mess at least. Apparently, if it were going to be fixed, it was on her to do it, because he didn't want to try anymore.

She couldn't blame him, but at the same time, it hurt. She was paying for his mother, for everyone else who ever hurt him and left him, or screwed him over.


	4. she was my dream

_"She was my dream. She made me who I am, and holding her in my arms was more natural to me than my own heartbeat. I think about her all the time. Even now, when I'm sitting here, I think about her. There could never have been another."_

Jon sat there, watching her intently. She'd been back about 2 weeks by now, and since that night at the park, when she'd told him she'd see him around, she'd done everything she could to avoid him. She couldn't avoid him in class however, though she could ignore him.

Which she was doing right now, apparently. He hissed her name again and nothing. She didn't even look up from the grammar book, as her tongue slid slowly across her lower lip and her finger twisted in her brownish blonde hair while she worked.

When he'd done what he had the other night, said what he had, he never thought it'd be the straw that broke the camel's back. He never thought that she'd just do what he'd been doing to her first, when she came back, right back to him.

Now that she was, it was driving him insane.

He tried hissing her name again, their teacher looked up and glared at him, and Audrina looked up and gave him a confused and hurt look as she mouthed, "What do you want?" before looking back down at her book and her notebook, going back to work intently.

The girl sitting between them glared as he leaned across the aisle and muttered, "Move it now. Or ya won't like what I do to ya." smirking a slightly sadistic smirk at her as she gulped, hurriedly grabbed her notebooks and books, her book bag and found a cozier window seat, far away from the high school "crazy and bad guy".

Jon grabbed his books, slid into the seat and cleared his throat as he muttered, "Drina... Drinaaaa."

"Go away." Audrina muttered without looking up. She glared when her pen suddenly got snatched out of her hand, and Jon held it just out of her reach. Raising her hand, she smirked as she prepared to tell the teacher.

Apparently, her ignore the hell out of him tactic was accomplishing something, but given the stormy anger in his eyes, she just wasn't sure that it was going to have the desired effect in the end. She'd heard all kinds of things from friends she'd made, other kids in their grade about what he'd been getting into since she'd been gone.

What shocked her the most was his taking over Lavont Turner's turf, supposedly. Rumor had it, this happened a week or two ago, because Lavont disappeared, he hadn't been seen since.

"Hell no." Jon hissed as he grabbed her hand when she bent to pick up her pen where he dropped it so they'd have less distraction, more privacy, using the desks as cover to talk without his 'boys' looking at him as if he were some whipped weak bitch boy, and her friends just staring like she was an idiot for even talking to him.

"Damn it, Jon.. You said exactly what you needed to say a few weeks ago.. I'm leaving you alone.. Can't you leave me alone?" Audrina pleaded as she looked at him, watched him smirk and then shake his head, lean in.

"Never said I wanted ya to leave me alone, Drina." Jon said as he shrugged.

"You said it best that night. Maybe you're right. We're so far apart now, we might as well have a damn ocean between us instead of the park." Audrina muttered as he looked at her a moment. "You don't mean that."

Audrina shrugged, sighed sadly, even though inside she was cheering.. Knowing him like she did, she knew that there was one thing he hated more than anything, and that was being ignored.. Which is exactly what she'd been doing, on purpose, to make him talk to her now.

Her friends all thought she was nuts, but she didn't care. Let them chase after the jocks, the preppy douchebags, the 'pretty boys'.. She'd known since she kissed him that despite all of his problems, all of the baggage he had with him, Jonathan Good was where her heart lie.

Now, apparently, she just had to make him see this.

He looked at her, a silent rage building. He'd watched some jock asshole flirting her up for the better part of two weeks. Of course, she never flirted back, but..

Apparently, he was gonna have to get the same message out to the jock that he had to Lavon in the alley a week or so ago.

He smirked and leaned in closer, muttering, "See, Drina, I don't think ya do. And I'm gonna prove it." right as the bell rang.

He stood, grabbing his books, running out into the hallway. The look in her eyes just now gave him more than enough hope to go on.

He saw her again about 10 minutes later, by her locker with her idiotic little stuck up and bitchy friends. That jerk, of course, was standing there, slowly trying to slide his arm around Audrina's shoulder. He smirked as he walked past, pretending disinterest, chuckling when he heard the smack of skin on skin and that's when he realized that apparently, Audrina, as he suspected, did not enjoy the jock's advances.

Audrina growled as Oliver's arm went around her again. She shoved it down, he slid it right back up. "Can you get your damn hands off me?"

"But.."

"I do not want you touching me. Are we clear, or do I have to drop you on your ass?" Audrina asked calmly, quietly, her voice coming out sweet yet menacing at the same time.

Jon walked over and smirking, his arm shot out and he grabbed hold of Oliver, slamming him back against the locker. Audrina's friends scattered, of course, as the two guys rolled on the floor. Audrina groaned and yelped, "Damn it, Jon."

"He's fuckin with ya, Drina, I don't like it."

"Neither do I but what the hell do you care, anyway? Didn't you leave already?"

"Nah." Jon grunted as the two boys seperated and Oliver made his way down the hallway, holding his hand over his nose, bitching loudly about how crazy guys needed to go to the mental institution, not be allowed in school with decent students and civilized folk.

Jon held out his hand and smirking asked, "Do ya trust me?"

Audrina bit her lower lip, studied him intently. She almost walked away, but the pull there was too strong, so she took his hand and said quietly, "With my life. Thanks for that, by the way." as he practically dragged her out of the brick and mortar walls of their high school, then down the alley behind it, and farther.

"Where the hell are we going?"

"You'll see." Jon muttered as he smirked, kept dragging her closer to the bridge they'd been sitting on the edge of that day when she kissed him. Maybe if he reminded her of that day, she'd cave, admit that they couldn't honestly not be friends or in each others lives now, not given what they'd said sitting on the bridge that day.

Either way it went, she was vastly improving from the past two weeks, already, because she was actually talking to him, looking at him and not through him.. It was a start, right?


	5. we're not the same people

_"We're not the same people we were then. We've changed, we've grown."_

She looked at him as they sat quietly on the edge of the bridge and bit her lip, intent in thought. They'd never actually had to talk one another to death, the entire course of their friendship, a lot of times they just sat there with one another, thinking.

"What?"

Audrina shrugged as she looked up at the sunset and pointed out calmly, "It's gettin late. Why'd you bring me up here, Jon?" her eyes filled with curiousity as she looked at him for a few moments, her hand in her hair. He shrugged and said quietly, "Wanted to prove to ya that I didn't forget, I guess." as he pulled her against him and settled back against the steel support of the bridge's railing. "Why'd ya ask that?"

"Just curious.. I mean you keep doing one thing, acting one way and I think I figure you out and what you wanted out and now you're telling me that's not what you want.. Do you want me to forget you and move on, or what? Because, Jon? I don't like being confused." Audrina said as Jon shrugged and then said quietly, " I don't want ya to forget and move on, damn it. It's not over.. I'd feel it if it were over before it even started, and I don't."

"But you said, just a few minutes ago, Jon.."

"I know what I said, Drina, damn. Do ya have to start this? I don't wanna fucking argue with ya right now. Just wanna sit here and pretend none of that shit ever happened, that ya didn't leave and I didn't do all the stuff I did because I was alone." Jon said through gritted teeth.

"And you blame me, I suppose."

"Yes.. Wait, no. I mean no, damn it. I don't wanna feel anything for ya, but then ya come back here, and ya act like ya never left and I.." Jon raged as he looked around her shoulder at her, studying her face intently.

"I see. So you don't want to feel anything for me.. Yeah, you make all kinds of sense right now, Jonathan." Audrina muttered, he could hear the slight bitterness and annoyance in her voice, as she said it, as if saying his full first name wasn't a tip off enough that he'd just annoyed her.

"Because it can't work, damn it." he said as Audrina turned and looked at him, leaning in close enough to put her arms on his shoulders and her forehead to his as she nodded and sighing sadly said "I know. It can't and it probably won't, but ya know what, Jon? Screw it. Because I wanna at least try, damn it."

He looked at her and blinked, shocked a little at her just blurting that out like she had. "Ya have heard what everyone's been sayin about me... Right? Ya should be runnin like hell right now, Drina."

Audrina shrugged and said calmly, "Should, but I'm not. Because I knew you before those idiots did. I know the guy who punched that one kid in the nose for calling me stupid when we were on the bus.. Or the guy who used to let me get the orange popsicles at the ice cream truck because he knew I hated all the other ones.. Not this jerk he's let himself become, just because everyone 'expects' it of him. No, Jon, I expect more from ya, and I think that scares ya."

He nodded. It was a fair assessment, because it did. Just like his wanting her with as much passion as he did scared him, really. Because he'd learned over time that when you want something that much? That's usually when everyone in the world conspires against you to take it away, and eventually it gets taken away.

The sun was sinking even lower now, and he knew that if they didn't get back to the bus stop, her father would probably send every asshole on the force down here looking for her, and there's no telling what he'd do to her, if he caught her on this side of town. He remembered how mean the guy could be, how afraid Audrina really was of her father.

She turned in his lap and leaned against him, listening to his heart beat, not saying anything as she looked up at him, waiting on him to say something.

Finally, he did. He looked at her and muttered quietly, "Don't say I didn't warn ya when I fuck up." as he leaned in and placed his hand on the back of her neck, pulling her into a rough kiss, nibbling at her lips. Audrina smiled and kissed back, leaning completely against him as she said quietly, "I've told you this before, Jon.. I trust you with my life.. And I'm no angel.. Who's to say I won't fuck this up first?"

The kiss broke and they sat looking at one another, dazed for a moment before he finally said stiffly, "Let's get ya back across town before ya dad has a shit fit and I have to kill him for hurtin ya."

She winced as she remembered that unlike any of her so called friends, Jon, of course, knew exactly what she'd grown up in and how her father was.

He let her get out of his lap and then jumped down the short jump to the ground, and then pulled her easily off of the bridge and onto his back, jogging through a maze of people, shoving some , stopping finally at the bus stop. He gave her a quick kiss goodbye for the night and whispered, "Next time, I'll come to ya." as he winked and walked back down the sidewalk, blatantly ignoring the looks he got, or the looks they'd gotten for being together.

For now, everything was good again. But he just had this bad feeling that Murphy's Law was about to go to work in their 'relationship' ..


End file.
